I survived one quarter of it, but I’ve got to say that I am afraid that I won’t even be able to hang in there, faith wise, that is. I’ve experienced so much already considering the relatively short time that I spend on campus. Let’s just say, I now understand why college kids are abandoning God in droves.
It’s funny, but a lot of the things I was warned about are actually happening. The secularism, the left-wing spin, yes sir, it is all real. My goodness, I wouldn’t be surprised to find myself protesting and smoking weed, or worst of all, listening to folk music. And that stuff isn’t even my style! It’s truly amazing the kind of effect your environment can have on you. But you can’t let them get to you, you just can’t be so pliable. Isn’t it obvious- the former hippies are the new “man!” They’re running the university- but we have no obligation to believe them, we just have to pass their tests. They rebelled against the ideas of the generation before them. We can rebel against them. It’s important to remember that.
In my humanities class, we are reading the Bible for its “historical” blah blah blah. I sit there and listen to them dissect it, call it names, treat it as if it’s just another fictional story. The worst part is, sometimes what they say makes sense.
You have to continually remind yourself that it’s all just their opinion. Man, in his arrogance, thinks he has all the answers, but he doesn’t. Human knowledge has failed on so many occasions. I don’t know if I even need to give examples of that.
Has it occurred to anyone that the Bible seems to contradict itself because we just don’t understand it? Has it occurred to anyone that life itself is contradictory- that so many things cannot be easily explained in words? God told us what He thinks we need to know.
But sadly, even when it seems like I’ve won that particular battle, another one begins. It is not the battle raging in many a dorm room about whether or not God exists and that He inspired the writings of the Bible- it is the question of whether or not any of it matters. It is a question of whether or not I love God. It is a scary question. I hate to even think about it, there is somethings so sinister, so awful, so taboo about the thought of directly rejecting God even when I intuitively know that He exists, and, what’s more, that He wants what is really the best for me and for all us. And yet that is the question that we need to have an answer to, a good, solid answer. I do feel bad for even having doubts about my intentions in life- but I have to remember that this is, after all, spiritual warfare. Maybe it’s better if I let my doubts out in the open instead of shrouding them in indifference. Or maybe it doesn’t matter which path I take, I don’t know. But at the end of the day, we are either for God, or against Him. It doesn’t matter much the reasons- whether “intellectual ” or purely spiritual. We either serve ourselves, man, ultimately Satan- or we serve God. That’s all.
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